Update

Apparently our viewing public is avid for some sort of update. I guess we have both been somewhat quiet since Tucson, but I’ve received some emails and in-person conversations asking what we are doing and where we are going from here.

We are making plans for me to fly back and visit her in her hometown environment over Halloween. This happens to be her favorite holiday and splits the difference between Tucson (mid-Sept) and Christmas nicely. It allows us about a week to continue figuring “us” out and getting comfortable with each other.

I’ll admit that I’m both excited and nervous. Excited because this is a significant step—meeting one another in one of our home towns. That is huge in a long-distance relationship. The safety of the anonymous internet and telephone, of the distance, and of a neutral city (although Tucson feels like home now, with as much of it as we saw!—have to go back there someday; beautiful city) are all ripped away and we are both left bare. It is a significant step and a significant, but necessary, risk. I’m very much looking forward to it.

The nervousness comes from being the first to step into the other’s city. I will be the first to meet her friends, see her home, and meet her family. I am not really that nervous about it—I know how much I like her, I have spoken with quite a few of her friends and they seem like great people, and all I can be is myself with her family. It is more the thought of what this could mean, where it could lead. We are now heading into the "significant steps" in any relationship; they are just magnified by the distance.

In a traditional relationship, you might date for a few weeks, going out a couple of times a week, before you begin the process of meeting each other’s families. We do not have that luxury. We need to compress more of the dating experience into less time, as the distance does not allow us the luxury of time or convenience.

Luckily, we continue to promote open and honest communication as the most important attribute in our relationship, so these compressed meetings will not be as stressful as they otherwise could be.

Her younger brother sounds like someone I would like even if he was not related. Her dad seems like a handy guy, smart, and he loves her a lot. Her older brother, being protective, may not like how we met, but he seems like a good guy. The only person I am nervous about meeting is her mom; she sounds like a woman who has strong feelings about her daughter’s boyfriends. All I can really do is express my feelings for her daughter and hope she approves. Maybe that will be enough?

I am most excited about seeing her town and meeting her friends. She speaks so passionately about her home town that it must be a wonder to behold. And, I’m told, it has these things called “trees” and areas filled with these trees that just occur naturally—they are not all designated as “parks” and only full of soccer moms taking their children to the latest match. Oh, and get this! There is a river there that isn’t in a flood channel and carefully contained by concrete! What kind of river is allowed to roam free? Weirdness! ;-)

Her many friends seem great (those with whom I’ve spoken). I look forward to pumpkin carving, shopping, and karaoke with some or all of them (although all are on a strict “John doesn’t sing” alert—do not even try!). I look forward to going to mass with her in her much-loved church. I am taking my date to a nice sit-down restaurant called Suwanna at some point. Oh, and I should stop by the florist I’ve been using—can’t have them ruining the surprise because they can’t find her address! They need a good talking to on that subject-- haven't they heard of mapit.com or Yahoo! Maps? Sheesh!

So, although I hate to fly with a passion, I will be boarding an ungodly number of airplanes (granting that any number above 0 is “ungodly” in my book—why do you think I drove to Tucson?) and winging east to meet this wonderful woman in her hometown.

There is no point in wishing me good luck—I’ve already used it all up and then some meeting this great girl.