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March 7, 2012

Future Imperfect

My wife's aunt is dying from liver disease. This last weekend we went up to hang out with her and to scan in and save a bunch of photos from her large collection. While the weekend was tough for my wife, for all of the obvious reasons, it may have been just as tough on me. You see, I have liver disease and visiting someone dying from the same illness was like looking into the future.

Her aunt was in better shape than we could have hoped. While she is yellow, it is not as all-pervasive as shows like House make it seem, meaning she isn't as bad as she could be. The whites of her eyes, for example, are still mostly white, and her gums and nails aren't yellow yet. But her skin definitely has an unnatural jaundice to it, especially around her neck and her ankles. She has a lot of fluid build up, and that is slowing her down more than anything, she says. She estimates she's carrying around 40 extra pounds of simple fluid build up in her body.

I have been diagnosed with liver disease since 1995. I take my medications regularly and see my doctors multiple times a year with blood tests. All signs point toward my liver doing well and maybe even regenerating some from the disastrously bad cirrhosis found during a biopsy in 1997 (where they estimated I was between 15 and 20 percent functionality... or just above the minimum levels for a functional liver). But I still have swelling and fluid build up fairly often, even with the medications, although, so far, nothing like the aunt is experiencing. Since mine is autoimmune related, I also have other autoimmune issues to worry about, namely rheumatoid arthritis. And, as anyone who knows about autoimmune issues understands, autoimmune issues tends to snowball into more autoimmune issues as the patient gets older.

The good thing about liver disease in general is that it is not a painful way to go, which the aunt confirms. The medications she takes cause her more distress than the disease itself. But it is still hard to watch someone become jaundiced and die, especially when that fate may be my future. If I needed it (which I didn't, but still), it certainly is a wake-up call to continue taking my medications religiously and continue seeing my doctors regularly.

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