Showing posts from August, 2010

Bell Mobility Serves You... With a Side of Ketchup

First, I have received three phone calls from Bell Mobility telling me that I have won a free, $800 iPhone... all I need to do is sign up for a minimum $50/month three year deal ($1800) to get it! What a deal. *sarcasm

Secondly, I have to endure the heavily, heavily accented Indian who calls to inform me of this deal. I can barely understand his English, yet he claims his name is "John" (today), "Stan" (yesterday), and "Mike" (the first day). Of course it is. *sarcasm

Thirdly, I argued with Mike for a while about getting them to send me the phone but I don't want a new plan or any service on it. "But how can you use the service?" he asked. "I don't want to use the service," I reply. "Either I won a free phone or I didn't. If I have, then send me the phone. I'll either give it away, sell it, or get my own plan at my leisure."

Moments away talking in a language that definitely isn't English, and is not a rom…

Blog Life

A friend of mine is struggling with his blog, as he recently moved from a long-term position in London back to his home in SoCal. The blog was initially his way of ranting and raving about the changes he was experiencing and the unusual circumstances he found himself in while being that "duck out of water" in a foreign land. One of his issues seems to be that he so identified his blog with that point in his life that he does not know what to do with it now.

When I moved to Canada, my blog changed focus quite a bit to reflect the differences, both frustrations and joys, at coming to a foreign land for, presumably, the rest  of my life. I originally created a second blog, intending it to be only for my comments as an expatriate living abroad (okay, 70 miles or so from the Maine border, but still in a foreign country), but I soon realized that my original blog, this one, was already ready to serve that need.

I named my blog "Omniverse" for a specific reason. I cobbled…

Asked and Answered

Imagine you know how to sew by hand. You have been sewing this way since your parent taught you and, while not an expert by any means, you feel confident with a needle and thread. You have rarely, if ever, used a sewing machine, however.

Now you take this expertise somewhere where your superior asks you, "Can you sew?" You reply strongly in the affirmative. However, what they thought they were asking was 'do you know how to use a sewing machine, all of its attachments, and features?' Your answer to the question asked is completely accurate, honest, and true, but it does not answer the question the boss thought he/she was asking.

The boss, thrilled with your answer, then asks you to perform a task, "I need you to sew the buttons in this jar onto these outfits by lunch time."

After the boss leaves, you pick up a needle and thread, and you get to work. You sew buttons the way you have always done them. You sew them as fast as you can, and you get the job done …